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Melissa Fino

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Suite 7742

San Diego, CA 92167

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    MELISSA'S MUSINGS

    A place where heart and mind can connect through the power of words.

    The Three Reasons why Most of Our Dreams Die

    January 18, 2019

    Face your Fears. Live your Dreams.

     

    What keeps you up at night?

     

     

     

         If you’re like many of us the thoughts that keep you up at night turn to the past or turn to the future. We think about what we’ve wronged and we dream about where we’d like to go.

     

         But then we wake up. Our feet touch the ground and we forget about the thoughts we had the night before. So we continue on with our day just as we have before.

     

     

         We push our thoughts down or bury them deep inside. Some of us just let them go. And then we do the worst thing we could possibly do. We tell ourselves that our dreams are just thoughts we have at night, thoughts that are not meant to see the light.

     

    Does this resonate with you? Well I must tell you, you’re not alone.

     

         But regardless of what our thoughts (conscious and subconscious) prompt us to believe our dreams can be achieved. It’s possible to return to school after a twenty-year hiatus, find love again after a messy divorce, lose twenty pounds or attain what we believe to be is impossible. The thoughts that keep us up at night are the dreams are hearts ache to achieve.

     

    So why don’t we spend more time chasing the beautiful things our hearts desire?

     

    Oh my friend, the list goes on and on. So here it begins…

     

    Our Thoughts

     

         They prompt us to repeat things over and over in our head that tell us we’re not worthy of the things we desire. Most of us DON’T EVEN KNOW that this is happening when it is happening as it happens subconsciously. Our hearts crave a deeper purpose so we look for new jobs to fill them but at the same time a little voice whispers inside that it seems difficult. It’s unlikely to happen. Let’s just stay here where it’s comfortable. We may want to believe in ourselves and our capabilities but deep down underneath we don’t.

     

    We’re either not worthy, not good enough, not deserving or something else.

     

         Whatever it is it’s just not right for what our hearts desire. If this is you, I implore you to dig deep and listen to the thoughts that repeat in your head.

     

    Our Fears

     

         We’ve allowed our fears to become larger then the dreams we dream. This usually happens when we’ve tried something once and have failed. But this isn’t just any type of failure. This is the kind of failure that has ripped our hearts out of our chest and tore them into tiny little pieces all over the floor. We still haven’t even recovered yet and the thought of trying again makes us want to throw up.

     

     

     

    Failure happens.

     

         And at times it pushes us down to our knees. So much so that getting back up becomes the impossible dream to achieve. But failure is the only way we ever make it to a win. Every failure brings us closer to that BIG DREAM as we’re learning every step of the way.

     

    Our Excuses

     

         So many things stand in our way and act as obstacles to our desires. Well as least that’s what we remind ourselves when we don’t take action. We don’t have enough time. Or money. Or our families will think we’re crazy. We’d have to move. Perhaps even sell all of our belongings.

     

         And these are all excuses that we tell ourselves so we don’t have to do anything that’s uncomfortable. The truth is it’s easier to look back and blame someone else, or something else for not going to the places we’d like to go then look inside and find that we are the reason why.

     

    We are the only obstacle that prevents us from moving forward.

     

         We can change our thoughts, but we have to do the work. We can succeed after failure we just have to get back up. We can quit using excuses and push past the uncomfortable but we are the only ones WHO CAN DO IT.  No one else can do it for us.

     

    So I have to ask you again, what do you dream of at night?

     

         Think about your thoughts. The ones you say out loud and the one’s you don’t. Consider the times you’ve failed. As well as the excuses you’ve used as to why you don’t try. And then ask yourself if there is a way the you can look at these experiences or thoughts differently?

     

    I believe there is.

     

         A simple statement as “I’ve tried and failed before” could be reframed to “I learned something the last time that I didn’t know before.”

    Or “I’ve always failed” can become “this is a great opportunity for me to achieve.”

     

         When we reframe the words that we repeat to ourselves we also change the subconscious programming that exists deeper inside. It’s a huge win all around.

     

     

    Dreams are scary but they're possible to achieve.

     

         You’re never too poor, young, old or imperfect to chase after them. The truth is there is no guarantee that when we chase after our dreams they’ll turn out they way we envision them to be. But the only thing scarier than not chasing our dreams is spending our days wondering what would have happened if we did. Regret is scarier then any of our dreams. So let it all go and look deeper inside. What do you dream of that keeps you up at night? 

    Get busy planning and make them all real.

     

    Our dreams are our own and they’re ours to achieve.

     

     

     

     

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